While watching an older episode of The Biggest Loser, I heard something amazing, something I’d never really thought about before. While counseling a contestant, Jillian Michaels said that you can be so afraid of your success that you sabotage your weight loss, thereby ensuring that you won’t be successful. Whoa. And, huh?
And, yeah, right on. Especially if you are a mom. Think about it. Moms are conditioned, from before the baby arrives to put the baby first. Think of the baby, do what’s best for the baby. In the beginning, of course, there is a lot of validity to this sentiment. But babies grow up, change and become interested in other things, and moms often stay in the same position, stagnant and directionless. It is an almost martyrdom, placing the wants and needs of every other member of the family above hers. In a far too often scenario, this leads to weight gain. And then the vicious cycle begins.
Doing the work necessary to get yourself in shape requires time. It means taking classes, developing a running habit, learning to cook in a better manner. It means that you might not make your family the center of your universe every second of the day. That focus will shift a bit, to be centered on you. There might be times where this evolution would make members of your family uncomfortable.
I certainly know that it feels safe to keep the weight on, to stay heavy and virtually invisible as you’ve always been. No one really notices the heavy mom behind the family. I did that for years and years, never taking the time to take care of myself, never wanting to spend money or time ON myself. But you are worth it – you are worth the time and the attention that you need to give yourself. You aren’t selfish or petty to focus a bit of your hard earned time and money on yourself. I promise. Put yourself at the top of your list for a while, and I think you’ll be surprised at how good you feel.
You are worth any amount of time that it takes. I promise.
Thanks Carmen! While deep down I know this, it’s good to hear it. Hopefully it will sink in!
Amen sister, Amen!!
It’s nice when you finally realize you actually have more of yourself to GIVE when you TAKE some time for yourself. It’s getting there & changing that mindset that’s the hard part….
Thanks for the reminder:)
Exactly what I needed to read today, Carmen.